Making the Most of Your Summer

Head's Message By Dr. Jenn Milam,

It was the Cookie Monster who said, “Today, me will live in the moment, unless it’s unpleasant in which case me will eat a cookie.” And I find this to be a perfect philosophy for summer. In a world in which we are all so hurried, overscheduled, and preoccupied with using all of our moments productively, we miss the opportunity to play, to dream, todawdle - to be in the moment - and to learn new things that we may miss during the school year. 

As a community that nurtures young people who learn differently, it is imperative that we remember not just that summer is fun and time for family and maybe a vacation, too, but that summer is an important part of learning - an opportunity for growth in unexpected ways from rest and tasks that may usually fall just beyond our hurried grasp. Our young people find themselves in worlds managed and scheduled by us, quite often, and summer is an opportunity for them to share some agency around their plans. Can we sleep a little later? Sure. Can we linger a little longer in the shower? Absolutely. Can we hang out with a friend who’s home is further away than we typically can during a school year when we are busy? YES! How about a visit to a local craft store for yarn to try knitting or a kit for model building? Perfect! How about a lazy day on the couch? Sounds delightful!

In my time working with parents and families, I have found that the anxieties we feel to ensure our children have all the opportunities to be successful and engaged, can sometimes nudge us to miss the opportunities for some small, joy-filled wins. Along with those mentioned above, it’s also a great time to model and teach things that require a little more processing time and practice at home - loading the dishwasher, laundry, mowing the lawn or taking care of outdoor plants, organizing closets, sorting and organizing the homework space. When our brains are at rest - relaxed and calm - we learn better. And in a world that is hurried with our young people, moments to teach self-management and executive function in low-stakes ways are excellent and, dare I say, enjoyable! Child mental health experts also share that providing opportunities for our young people to try new things, sometimes fail or make a mess, and start again, is an excellent way to build self-confidence and self-trust. And what better time to offer low-stress opportunities than summer! 

So the next time you’re feeling like maybe you should plan something “big” or “fun”, just look around your home, take a deep breath, and ask your young person how they might like to spend their down time. Have they ever wanted to try a new hobby? Read a book that might just be a little more challenging for them (which maybe you can read along with them)? Take a nap or go for a swim? All of these are important for learning and our bodies and our brains need intentional rest and recovery time to work their best throughout the school year. 

At my previous school, the Head of School always gave two “homework assignments for the summer” - to READ and to PLAY! I’ll add to that, and encourage you to BE IN THE MOMENT…and, if that proves unpleasant, do as Cookie Monster would, and have a cookie! 

NOTE: The Head’s Message is a new and regular feature in THE NEST. You’ll hear weekly from Dr. Jenn Milam on topics relevant to child development, learning, parenting, and education. Additionally, you’ll have the pleasure of hearing from other members of our leadership team in Guest Head’s Messages, throughout the year on timely topics of interest and special events.